A Sad Realization
by M M Forever
Summary: Hideki's mother dies, and Chii asks him questions about what death is. My first attempt at a Chobits Fanfiction, so please R&R! Chapter 4 is now up! Please R&R! Or I won't update it any more!
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Chobits. Never will either, unless I suddenly win the lottery TWICE.

( IE- Never going to happen.)

CHAPTER 1: What is dead, Hideki?

Chii looked out the window at the angry sky, the wind blowing the trees frantically. She was so glad that she wasn't outside, but she was worried about Hideki, who had not yet returned home from work. The sky opened up, and poured its tears on the world, and Chii wondered why the sky was so sad. What could possibly make the sky so sad that it would cry so much? Hideki had explained to her that when something bad or sad happens, people cry. Chii had only seen a few people cry, but never Hideki. Was this because Hideki was never sad?

Glancing out the large window, she saw a figure slowly walking towards the apartment doors. A huge grin appeared on her pale face as she realized it was Hideki, finally returning. She stood quickly and walked over to the door, standing there waiting for him to open the door. He came in a few minutes later, completely drenched from head to toe.

"Hideki! Welcome back!" Chii greeted him happily.

"Hi Chii," he murmured, not returning the smile she'd given him as he removed his sopping wet shoes and left them on the small mat to dry. Chii frowned as he walked past her and headed over to the closet and pulled out dry clothes to change into. He trudged to the bedroom to change, dripping water all over.

"Is Hideki sick? Hideki's stomach hurt him?" Chii asked after he returned to the main room, a worried look on her face.

"No Chii… I'm not sick. But I am hurting… my heart is hurting," he told her as they sat down by the short table on the floor.

"What's wrong? Why is Hideki's heart in pain?"

"Chii… my mother died…" he said, his head hanging down in grief.

Chii stared blankly at him. She knew what 'mother' was, but 'died' was one that she'd never heard before.

"Chii… doesn't understand. What is died?

Hideki looked up at her, the hurt evident in his voice. His eyes watered up, and for the first time, Chii saw him cry.

"It means someone is dead. When someone is dead they no longer can talk, move, or breathe. It's… it's like when a Persocon stops working and breaks down. But unlike a Persocon, a human can not be repaired and is 'broken' forever."

Chii looked terrified. Broken forever?

"Then what happens if the person can't be fixed?" Chii asked, half dreading the answer. "Is a person thrown out?"

"No, they are either buried in the ground or cremated."

"Cremated?" Chii asked, confused once more.

"It's when a body is turned into ashes by burning them and then the living relatives take the ashes and usually release them into the wind."

"Burning?" Chii echoed. "But doesn't that hurt?"

"No, when someone is dead they can't feel anything anymore. They leave their bodies."

"Where does a person who is dead go then?"

"They go to a place called Heaven. It's a place where someone is always happy, and they never feel any pain ever again, even on the inside." Hideki whispered, brushing away a tear. "I believe that my mother is there now, and that she's very happy."

"But why do people die, Hideki?"

"People get sick sometimes, and can not be fixed. My mother had cancer, which is a type of sickness that is like that. Or people die when they get old, because like a Persocon, they just run down and stop working. Sometimes accidents happen and they die because of an injury. But sometimes, people get angry with each other and someone hurts another person to the point where they die."

"Why? Why do people hurt people?" Chii asked, trying to understand.

"I don't know."

Please Review! I have never written a Chobits fanfiction before, and I want to know what you all think! Should I continue?


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer- see first chapter, nothing has changed. I haven't won the lottery even once yet. :)

CHAPTER 2: Worries of the heart…

Later that night, while Hideki was changing into his pajamas, Chii reflected on what Hideki had told her as she stared out into the still angry and sad sky. It had stopped raining, but the dark ominous clouds still remained. She could tell that Hideki was still hurting, even though he'd stopped crying long ago. And the way he had explained death seemed so… wrong.

"_It means someone is dead. When someone is dead they no longer can talk, move, or breathe. It's… it's like when a Persocon stops working and breaks down. But unlike a Persocon, a human can not be repaired and is 'broken' forever."_

'How could something be broken forever?' Chii mused. 'If something happens to a person that breaks them, why can they not be fixed?'

Hideki came back from the bedroom, dragging the futon over towards her while carrying the sheets and blanket. Setting it down by her he quickly made the bed. Usually by this point, Chii would have offered to help, but she continued to stare out the window at the sky in deep contemplation. Hideki looked at her worriedly. She hadn't spoken much since their conversation about his mother's death and what death was. Thinking back on it, he wondered if it had been a good idea to tell her. But he'd been so caught up in the sudden grief of it that had blocked out all thoughts of sheltering and protecting her from the more depressing side of the world.

With a sigh he stood and walked over to her, knowing that what had been done was done; there was no way to take it back. Slowly, as so not to startle her, he reached out and gently laid his hand on her shoulder.

Chii turned her head around and looked up at him. She smiled, but the smile seemed to be unable to reach her usually bright eyes. She looked momentarily distracted, but then she spoke up.

"Is Hideki ready for bed?" she asked him curiously.

"Yes Chii, you can go change now, I'm done," he told her. She stood and made her way to the bedroom and shut the sliding door behind her as she entered.

'She didn't have her usual smile on her face', Hideki noted, frowning slightly as he turned away. A heavy sigh escaped him as he lay down, resting his head on the pillow. He'd been so distraught since his father had phoned him about his mother not feeling well a week earlier and going into the hospital, but he'd refused to let it get in the way of work and his studies. But when the phone call at work had come from him, he knew that something had been terribly wrong.

FLASHBACK

"Motosuwa! You have a phone call!" his manager called to him. Hideki looked up from the dishes, startled. His heart started to pound with worry. Had something happened to Chii or someone else he cared about? The next words sent his heart stuttering to a halt.

"It's your father!"

He froze. Why was his father calling him, and at work of all places? Could something have happened to his mother? Something was seriously wrong, he could feel it. Wiping his hands off on a nearby towel, he slowly moved towards the phone in the next room. His manager handed the phone to him with a quick look of sorrow in his eyes. At that, he knew something had happened. He lifted the phone to his ear and whispered,

"Is she alive?"

"Oh God… I'm sorry son, but she just died 10 minutes ago."

END OF FLASHBACK

He'd half been expecting it, but still, it was his mother. Someone who loved them no matter what he did; someone who had always been there to dry his tears and cheer him up when he was sad or hurt. But now it seemed that as bad it was to lose someone, it meant nothing when you knew that they were no longer in pain, and somewhere of perpetual bliss.

Chii came back changed into her night shirt that Hideki had given her, and switched off the light. She laid herself down next to him as they prepared to sleep, and Hideki closed his eyes after telling her good night and receiving the same back. But rather than shutting her eyes and shutting herself down for the night, she stared at the ceiling in though. After about ten minutes she broke the silence.

"Hideki?"

"Uhhhhhhh… what is it Chii?" he groaned, struggling to open his eyes to look at her.

"Does everything die?" Chii asked quietly.

"Everything that is born dies eventually, that's the way the world works," he replied, then closed his eyes again, desiring sleep. He was almost on the verge of sleep when she asked another question.

"Will Hideki die? Will Hideki die and leave like Hideki's mother?"

"Yes Chii, I will eventually die, but I won't any time soon and not necessarily the same way either. Don't worry Chii, I still have a long time to live before that happens."

Hideki turned over onto his side to face her. She still continued to stare at the ceiling in thought, though she still seemed sad. He yawned, just about to get ready to go back to sleep, more tired than before when she posed the last question.

"Hideki… do Persocon's go to Heaven?"

He stopped and tried to think about it. He had heard someone say that they thought that they did, but he'd also heard arguments that a Persocon was just a machine, a creation of humans, so they therefore had no soul and could not go to Heaven. Unsure, he spoke with hesitation.

"I'm not sure Chii, I've heard people say both yes and no. And I don't know that much about Persocons." With that, he closed his eyes and was sleeping within minutes, snoring slightly. But had he been awake, he would have seen Chii get up and move to the window to look outside again.

"Chii doesn't want Hideki to die," she whispered softly. "Not if Hideki goes somewhere Chii can't go with him."

Ok, that's the end of Chapter 2, and if I don't get any reviews, I won't put up the next chapter, ok?

M & M Forever


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Please see the first page, nothing has changed. I have actually less money now than I did then.

The sun was peaking above the horizon shyly, most of the sunlight being partially blocked due to the remaining clouds from the previous night's storms. Hideki groaned and rolled over onto his side so he faced away from the light, still tired from the day before. In vain, he attempted to pry his heavy eyelids open to look at Chii's still form beside, but no matter what he tried to coax himself with, nothing seemed to work.

After a few tries he managed to be able to lift one of them for a brief second before it wearily closed once more. He lay like that for almost a minute when something clicked in his exhausted mind, and suddenly his eyes snapped open, the soul behind them stricken with fear and worry. Chii's half of the futon was empty!

Stumbling to his feet he threw off the covers and looked wildly about the room for some hint to where she could have gone. The room was empty, but her nightshirt was in a small heap next to where she'd placed her clothes for that day the night before, which were now gone. Cursing slightly under his breath, he ran into the bedroom and threw on a white shirt and a pair of blue pants.

"Oh God Chii, where did you go?" he mumbled out loud in dread as he almost tripped and fell as he climbed into his pants. "Did something happen to you that made you run off?"

Finishing dressing, he stumbled over to the door, slipped on his shoes as fast as he could and slung the door open as he grabbed his backpack from the floor for school. He glanced quickly at the clock, which told him he had a little less than a half an hour to get to school and find Chii. He shut the door behind him and stood outside of it for a short minute to think about where she might have gone without him.

"Should I start with the area around her work or should I go ask Minoru for help?" he questioned himself, trying to figure out which would be the best approach. "Minoru probably would be able to find Chii faster than I would on foot, so I'll head over there."

Finally making up his mind, he slung the backpack on his shoulders and ran down the stairs and out the door. Turning the corner out of the apartment complex and towards his friend's house, he exclaimed,

"Oh God, Chii, please be ok!"

Meanwhile, Chii continued to walk aimlessly in the park, her heart troubled. She felt a deep pain in her chest, and she lifted her hand to her heart as she walked, a gentle breeze blowing her hair around her face. This was possibly the third time she'd been by this part of the lake, but she hadn't really been paying much attention to her surroundings.

"All things die… and Hideki will die… Can Chii not go with Hideki to where Hideki will be when Chii stops working?" Chii whispered, and the pain she felt throbbed inside of her. Who could tell her for sure, did anyone know? Could anyone tell her what she longed to hear?

A Frisbee came flying out of nowhere and hit her left arm gently and clattered to the ground. Chii looked down at it, surprised, and then up at the little girl who came to get it. Chii bent down and picked it up and handed it to the child as she came running up.

"Thank you, Miss, did I hurt you?" the little girl asked, a worried look on her face. Chii shook her head, a small smile appearing for the first time that day.

"Chii is fine; Chii did not get hurt from Frisbee…" Chii told her, slowly trailing off, the smile slowly fading from her face. The little girl cocked her head to one side as she frowned.

"Are you sure you're ok? You look hurt…"

"Chii is hurt… but Little Girl with Frisbee did not hurt Chii."

"My name is Yukiko Ishitawa, Miss Chii. It is a pleasure to meet you." The little girl smiled in reply, sounding very proper and mature for her age. "Can I help you stop being so sad? Would you like to play Frisbee with me?"

"Chii does not know how to play Frisbee," Chii told her with a small, sad smile, but it seemed not to matter to her. She took Chii's arm and led her back towards her family.

"That is fine, I'll teach you!"

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Author's Note: please R&R, or no more story, ok?


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer- see first chapter, nothing has changed. I haven't won the lottery even once still. :( I'm much closer to being flat out broke than I'd want to admit, really… I don't even have the money for clothes for school… which isn't good…

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Hideki slowly trudged down the sidewalk, his head hanging down in defeat and worry. No matter what Minoru and he had tried, no one had apparently seen Chii anywhere, nor had Minoru and he been able to track her before Hideki had had to leave for school. It appeared that Chii had disappeared completely from the face of the Earth.

Minoru had promised him he'd continue searching for her with the help of Sumomo, whom Hideki had wisely brought with him from his apartment. He'd considered stopping off at his landlady's apartment on his way to Minoru's, but then remembered that she had gone out of town for the week, so there was no way of reaching her or even a point in troubling her on this one. It was his problem now, his responsibility. And he did not relish the idea of having to tell her that he had lost her daughter yet again.

Hideki gradually made it to school, his mind still plagued with worry and distress. And although he was already late, he still went anyways, believing that as much as he wanted to, he could not afford to miss another day of cram school. However, between the disappearance of Chii and the death of his mother, it quickly became apparent that he was in now mood or mental shape to comprehend half of what he normally understood of Takako Shimizu's lessons. He kept staring out of the window, and wasn't even aware that she had called on him twice. Shinbo, who was sitting next to him as usual, jabbed him in the stomach to get his attention.

"Motosuwa-kun," Shimizu reprimanded him gently as he turned to face her with an embarrassed look on his face. "If you keep looking out the window I'm going to be forced to hang you out of it by your ankles until promise to pay attention." The class chuckled at her joke, but Hideki just bowed his and said very softly. "Hai…"

Shimizu turned on her heel and called on someone else for the answer, frowning slightly. Usually she got at least some sort of blush or chuckle out of him, but today he was looking unusually pale and preoccupied. She glanced at him again in a few minutes and found him spaced out and watching his book with unmoving eyes, hardly an improvement.

Hideki tried to stay focused for the rest of the lesson, but found that when he tried to concentrate on his book, all he could see were random words that blurred in and out of focus. Simply just listening to Shimizu was quite possibly worse, as his mind refused to think of anything other than where Chii could have run off to, entwined with worry for how his father was coping with the death of his wife, something Hideki was certain he was struggling through. He had planned on going back home for the weekend, but that was a little less than three days away, as it was only Wednesday.

Hideki groaned and let his head sink into the pages of his book, unable to contemplate anything at this point. Why had he even bothered to come to school anyways? Between the death of his mother and the disappearance of Chii, he was in no shape to try and learn his lessons, something he usually did poorly at even when he _could_ manage to pay attention to what Shimizu was saying.

The bell finally rang after what seemed like weeks, signaling the end of the session, but Hideki was not listening to a single word Shimizu spoke about the homework assignment due the following week. He wasn't even paying attention to the fact that Shinbo had called his name twice before resorting to waving his hand in front of his face. Only then did Hideki snap out of his trance-like state and turn to his close friend.

"Eh? Did you want something Shinbo?" he asked him, and Shinbo sweat dropped.

"Man, you are really out of it today. What have you been up to that you're this tired at only 1 in the afternoon?" Shinbo gave him a half-serious grin. "Are you keeping busy late at night with your magazine models again? Is that it?"

But rather than Hideki maneuvering him into a headlock, he simply just shook his head, went back to his spaced-out look as he stood up and headed towards the door. It took another five minutes for Shinbo to get his attention, the two of them walking down the street towards the bus stop to head home.

"Come to think of it, you've looked dead on your feet for the past two weeks or so. Maybe I should lend you Sumomo… she'll get you into a better sleeping routine."

"No thanks…" came a murmured response. Shinbo stopped dead in his tracks and spun Hideki around, startling him.

"What is eating you?" he asked, placing both of his hand on Hideki's shoulders. "Something's not right; you don't act this way even when you're out of it. Usually you're more alive once we get out of the building at least. Chii's not broken or missing again, is she?"

At Chii's name, Hideki's head snapped up. It had suddenly occurred to him that he'd made a promise to stop by Minoru's to see if he'd had any luck in finding Chii. He glanced at his watch. Oh no, he was already a half an hour late!

"Sorry Shinbo! I've got to run! See you later!" he called before sprinting off down the street, leaving a very surprised and rattled Shinbo behind.

"What's got into him all of a sudden?"

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A/N: Sorry it took so long to up the next chapter, and sorry it's a bit of a filler, but my muse just isn't cooperating like it should. kicks broken muse to shop to have it fixed I'll try and put up a non-filler chapter soon! In the meantime, feel free to review! Thanks! 


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